Rather than taking someone else’s question and answering it, I want to use today’s Glad You Asked column to ask myself a question. So, this column will deviate from the others but I figure it’s OK to be a deviant from time to time. As long as the law isn’t involved, that is.

The question we all ask ourselves as each year ends: What are my New Year’s resolutions?

Inspiration struck Tuesday morning, after I received an e-mail from a dear friend who mentioned having a get-together soon. I was (once again) reminded that friends seek me out much more often than the other way around. I believe I am earning bad friend karma because of this.

My husband has had the opposite problem. He is always the one trying to round up his friends to do fun things together — going to a baseball game, bowling, sitting down for a pay-per-view boxing or Ultimate Fighting Championship match — and would even do the planning involved.

Sadly, getting “the guys” to want to do these things or simply show up is easier said than done. What can I say? Most of his friends are flaky. Well, he put his foot down and no longer goes out of his way to plan anything anymore. Not really a solution to the problem, but he came to the realization that you can’t change others. You can only change yourself.

While I don’t consider myself nearly as flaky as most of my husband’s friends, I admit that I always leave the planning or the ideas of events to others. I will refrain from using my usual justifications — including “I can’t afford it” (while I can justify shopping for things I don’t need), “They live too far away” (when I could always invite them here to Napa) or any other reason — when the truth is that I really could make more time for my friends and plan some events of my own. They don’t have to be extravagant outings or late-night reunions. They’d appreciate any event so long as we all get to spend time together.

My circle of friends consists of precious and few. While I don’t care to change that, I have to make an effort to keep those important people in my life exactly that — in my life.

So, my New Year’s resolution is to spend more time with friends.

On a related note, a colleague mentioned a similar resolution: to make a new friend this year. I think I will incorporate that into my resolutions list, too. These days we get so caught up in sending e-mail, sending text messages (though not while driving anymore, ahem), communicating through social networking sites, etc., that I believe we’re losing a lot of human interaction. That’s a shame. Why not leave our doors open to not only let our good friends and family in but to welcome the possibility of a new friend?

What is Glad You Asked?

Glad You Asked attempts to answer readers’ (and sometimes the writer’s) questions. Do you have a new question for the new year? Send one to dmontanez@napanews.com or call me at 256-2224.