Separate and not equal

Dear editor,

Victims of Prop 8 are being accused of having “sour grapes.” We should be content with domestic partnerships, we are told. We should accept the disposition of 51 percent of the state’s voter population, who are clearly not comfortable with the idea of same sex marriage.

Do you know what makes me uncomfortable?

1)  In a country founded on the separation of church and state, objections fueled by religious beliefs were allowed to alter the state constitution. Marriage is a civil right, transcending religious differences and definitions; it is not church property.

2) The California Supreme Court, created to impartially legislate ethical issues,  granted me the right to marry, then permitted this right to be taken away by a popular vote.

3)  Churches that sanction polygamy and harbor pedophiles are passing judgment on gay marriage.

4) At the time of  this writing, my only option for legal union is a domestic partnership, which offers me no federal rights at all.  I have no exemption from estate taxes and no tax-free transfer of ownership. As a non-family member, I have no legal right to be included in my partner’s employer’s health plan. Nor do I have any decision-making rights, even when my partner is hospitalized.

5) I am a gay citizen in a country that employs such policies as Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and the Defense of Marriage Act. I am somehow expected to find this acceptable.

6) Children of same sex parents continue to be marginalized and humiliated by a society that refuses to allow their parents the right to marry. As long as this discrimination continues, so will hate, intolerance and ignorance.

“Just don’t call it marriage,” one woman recently wrote, chiding gay couples for their audacity in wanting to wed.

To which all I can say is, “Just don’t call it equality.”

Jean Ryan

Napa

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