Remember when parents had talks with their prepubescent children about the birds and the bees? I don’t.

I probably wouldn’t have listened because at that age I knew everything. Besides, Mother wouldn’t have tackled a subject like sex. Just uttering the word could have sent me to my room.

Now, after having four children, I think I get it. Humans and flowering plants are similar in many ways. Let’s see if you can see similarities.

It’s all about attracting the opposite sex. In the business world, a bright red circle surrounding a red bull’s eye says you’ll find what you want here.

In our lives, there are several reminders of our quest for sex. How about an itsy bitsy yellow polka dot bikini, Barbie, or Botox red lips, great “abs,” implants, red convertibles or loud motorcycles?

We have the mobility to go after what we want. We can vocalize our intentions and experience emotions, and we certainly know how to advertise them.

Flowering plants have one goal: to produce seeds that will continue their species. But unable to move about themselves, they must signal pollinators, mainly birds and insects, to complete a sexual transfer. No emotions, just visible sex happening on warm days and evenings. Brilliant colors, enticing fragrances and accommodating shapes lure pollinators and provide bribes of nectar and pollen.

The first flowers were simple forms, probably cup-shaped, with male and female sexual parts in the center and a hidden ovary for protection from the weather or predators. Think of the California poppy (Eschscholzia californica), a brilliant orange flower surrounding orange and yellow sexual parts. Without a voice, it cries, “I’m ready when you are.”

Now, flowers can be either male or female or both, and their sex lives are complex. Squashes start out with only female parts, then bear flowers with only male parts, and then bear flowers with both.

Nature offers no guarantee that a flower will be pollinated. Each part of a flower has its reason for being. Petals are the star attractions, luring pollinators to visit. Some even have stripes or bright dots leading the way to the promised land.

Some plants have many flowers growing on one stem (delphinium or penstemon), with petals that open from the bottom to the top, offering continual meals to the pollinators.

Flower shapes and pollinators have adapted to fit each others needs. The generic flower has visible female parts in the center surrounded by the male parts. In the center, the female parts are the stigma, the style (together called the pistil) and the ovary that contains unfertilized ovules or eggs. Below the petals is a nectary gland that holds sugary liquid nectar. Nectaries are particularly visible on nasturtiums. I remember sucking honeysuckle nectar from the bottom of its flowers.

Stamens, the male parts, consist of long, thin filaments capped by an anther or pollen sac Anthers come in various shapes, releasing pollen on contact with the pollinators. Pollen must make contact with the ovules in the ovary to produce offspring.

When ready for sex, the female pistil may grow longer, glow or become sticky, more attractions for the pollinators. Scents may also become more intense.

Wind and water also carry pollen, often long distances. White-scented flowers attract night-flying moths. Hummingbirds are attracted by bell-shaped red or orange flowers. and honeybees are attracted by blue and yellow flowers. 

A female worker bee goes from flower to flower, rubbing pollen on its body as it delves deep into the center for nectar. When she is loaded with pollen, she makes a beeline straight for the hive. Back at the hive, she does a dance that tells the other worker bees where and how far to go for pollen and nectar.

Honeybees recognize the scents of hundreds of different flowers. A few chosen male bees, known as drones, fertilize the queen bee in the hive and hang out waiting for the female workers to come home with food.

The pollinators are looking for food and drink, and the flowers are waiting for a sexual transfer. After the transfer, the male stamen wilts and falls off. The flower begins to fade or turn color, then loses its petals, letting pollinators know the party’s over.

One or many pollen grains have reached the female style, and the nucleus of each one will grow a long tube in the style down to the ovary to fertilize the ovules. The ovary then begins to swell as the fertilized eggs grow into seeds and are ready to leave the flower. Rose hips are examples of swollen ovaries. When we snip off these swollen flower heads, the practice known as deadheading, we abort the whole sexual process, but that encourages the plant to produce more flowers.

 Did you notice any similarities? I wonder what happened to my yellow polka dot bikini. Summer is coming.

Contact Master Gardeners at the UC Cooperative Extension office, 1710 Soscol Ave., Suite 4, Napa, 253-4221, or toll-free at 877-279-3065. E-mail your garden questions by following the guidelines on their Web site www. master gardeners.org. Click on Napa, then on Have Garden Questions?