Author, actress, singer and public speaker Julie Caitlin Brown has one message: “Love First.”

“It’s the spiritual journey I’ve been on and my books, CDs and public speaking is a way for me to give back,” said Caitlin Brown from her Los Angeles Illumina Productions office. “I want people to know we’re all in this together. When you walk into a room of people, you make no demands on them. If you love them first, you’ll all be together. I don’t have to tell them who I am today, I already know who I am.”

Although she began making money with her singing at the age of 12, Caitlin Brown says she felt insecure when she was young.

“I was in a full body back brace through my senior year in high school,” said Caitlin Brown. “I didn’t know how to be me. Like many people, I was conditioned to behave so you’d like me. I went though my young adult years trying to make people happy with me.

“At 27, I went on a journey to make me happy with me. I realized I had nothing to give if I don’t feel good about myself. As I met diverse people while traveling internationally, I learned it was important not to be loved but to feel love.”

Her three books, “Love First, the Beginning,” “Love First and the Artist” and “Love First and Business” form the backbone for her international lectures and workshops.

“The feeling of love you have when you see a sunset, a baby or even a puppy, that energy comes from whatever you choose to call the creator. You act as a conduit for that energy, which is love. When you understand that internally, people will know you’re genuine. If we love ourselves first, we can walk into a room without a vibe of worry. When you meet people, you’re bringing your history, so spend time with them.”

Caitlin Brown has an interesting history. Her parents are Napa residents Don and Judy Andrich, former owners of the Napa Ice Company. She grew up in Folsom and lived in Napa about a year when her family moved to the valley. While living in Napa and then in Vallejo, she sang in venues throughout the Bay Area, including the Silverado Resort. From here, she moved to New York, Florida and Los Angeles, where she continued to sing and act. She recorded two CDs and appeared on Broadway in the musical “Grand Hotel,” was a television series regular on “Babylon 5,” and has had more than 35 guest star roles on shows including “Star Trek Deep Space Nine,” “Becker” and “JAG.”

Although she’s currently tied up with developing two reality shows and producing two movies, she says she’s missed acting, which she stopped four years ago when her youngest son was born.

“I miss the stage, although I sing whenever I can. In fact, sometimes I sing as part of my Love First presentations. It makes people listen on a different level. You hear music differently, more as a vibration within the body. It’s a wonderful way to communicate.”

Currently, she divides her time between her home in San Anselmo and her production and talent management businesses in Los Angeles. She has two children, ages 23 and four, and is married to photographer, graphic designer and business partner Craig Dam.

Do they practice “Love First” principles?

“Craig’s heard a ton of my lectures,” said Caitlin Brown. “Once he said, ‘Wow. I can really see how you can help bridge communication, first by listening to people and then using their idioms to connect with them, rather than hit them with your ideas.’ He realized what I was saying wasn’t male, female or romantic, it was basic human stuff.”

Caitlin Brown will be a featured speaker at the Third Annual Spirit in the Napa Valley community retreat to be held on Feb. 10 at the Mt. La Salle Christian Brothers Retreat Center. The daylong program, “Spirit in the Napa Valley to Inspire Health, Healing and Spirituality,” features keynote speaker Louise Franklin of the Center for Attitudinal Healing in Sausalito.

“I tailor my workshops to the message of the retreat,” said Caitlin Brown, who says she’s delighted to return to Napa. “I’ll be speaking about ‘Love First and You’ at the Napa retreat. We’ll take the beginning principle of Love First and apply it to everyday life. From that, the community can be more joyful, relaxed and allow people to be what they are. You want to live an authentic way without the resistance that causes unease.”

Her message is that you always have choices in how you act and react.

“You can’t control your first thought because that’s hard-wired into us. But you can control your second thought and don’t beat yourself up about the first. You always have choices to look at what you’d prefer. You’ll find yourself reaching for that loving thought more often. It will feel good and you won’t want to give it up. I believe with spiritual health you will have good physical health. That’s the reason I work with Élan Fitness in San Anselmo, a women’s-only gym where the yoga teacher has a program that connects body, spirit and mind.”

She has a final piece of Love First advice.

“I believe if you want to be heard, you have to recognize where the other person (mind set) is, that’s called bridging. Being heard requires listening. No one owes you love, respect, or approval. These are things that you must cultivate in yourself. What others flow to you is gravy. If you want to feel love, you have to start with you.”

Registration for Spirit in the Valley is $50 in advance, $65 at the door. Space is limited. For further information contact the Napa Interfaith Council, 226-7127.