For those who find tedious the depiction of Napa Valley wineries as a tasteful, if rural, pinnacle of the good life, Lin Weber has an alternate view.

Weber — a local author who has published three highly praised books on the history of the Napa Valley — has turned her talents to fiction with her first mystery novel, “The Wine Cellar.”    

Although her fictional winery may have the requisite Tuscan facade, on the inside it is the site of many harrowing deeds, not the least of which is the making of chili with bologna. Furthermore, it is run by a collection of thugs and lunatics who could easily claim a place of honor in Madame Tussaud’s chamber of horrors.

The Minotti winery is a ghost winery in more ways than one. Not only is it one of those that was founded in the 1800s, shut down by Prohibition and revived in the 1970s, but somewhere in the depths of its wine caves is the moldering skeleton of a government inspector. The current owner of the winery is Vittorio the Fourth, also known as Torey, a nutcase whose most likable characteristic — make that his sole likable characteristic — is his delusion that he is the Minotaur, that ravaging, flesh-eating beast that inhabited the labyrinth of Crete. A narcissistic, psychotic rapist, he has secured the top job at Minotti by murdering his parents, but don’t waste too much sympathy on them; he is just an oak chip off the family wine barrel (witness the government inspector). Now in charge, Torey has run the winery so deeply into financial chaos, with harvest imminent, there is be no one to pick the grapes because he’s not yet paid his bills from last year. He is, in a word, broke.

This is one hope for salvation, at least financially, for him. Although his parents may have had questionable morals, they did have good palates. Legend holds that hidden somewhere in the wine caves of Minotti is a treasure trove of wines. He just has to find it.

The obstacle to this is his cousin, Grace Potts, a psychologist who has inherited a cottage on the winery property. After meeting Grace’s sister, Cloe, an alcoholic wine writer, and her mother, a  thoroughly repellent person, it becomes clear it had to be accidental combination of recessive genes that rendered Grace a decent, kindly person who worries about her weight, reads books and has a cat named Carl Jung.

The cast of characters also includes a minister who drives a Maserati; a deranged public relations man, whose job before working for Minotti was working for McDonald’s; a tough-talking service station attendant doubling as the Minotti cook (she’s the one who puts the bologna in the chili); a racist, prima donna winemaker, an embezzling administrative assistant, and a menacing vineyard manager. Oh, and one nice guy, a loyal employee named Ray.

Thus Weber sets the stage for the harvest from hell, where Grace finds herself locked in a cellar with the psycho-looney Torey, her sister, a skeleton, a corpse, a billion spiders and — discovered at last — a priceless collection of wines. Meanwhile above ground, the winemaker is being carted away by the cops, the minister who arrives to bless the grapes brings a tad more than holy water, and no one is picking the grapes. The PR guy, however, is elated the press is showing up.

While Cloe decides the only solution is to drink herself into oblivion, starting with a bottle of Robert Craig, and Torey knocks himself out with a couple of bottles of 2001 Etude, the dauntless Grace decides she’d rather find an escape than have to dine on the remains of the vineyard manager.

In cases like these, it’s helpful to have a cat named Carl Jung.

Weber’s work is an imaginative page-turner, an entertaining read. It may be packed with darkness, but there’s a refreshing strain of humor in this memorable portrait of a winery few tourists would care to tour but no one would forget.

One can only hope that none of this is based on Weber’s historical research.

“The Wine Cellar” is published by Wine Ventures Publishing in St. Helena.

Meet the author

The Napa Valley Museum presents An Evening with Lin Weber. Friday, Dec. 1, 6-8 p.m. $20 members; $25 non-members. Reservations, 944-0500.